If you are considering a divorce, try to take good care of yourself. You’ll need to keep a clear head, so you can make the best decisions possible about your future. No one reaches this decision lightly and without losing a lot of sleep in the process.
The time leading up to filing for divorce, is always difficult and filled with more questions than answers. Before you file, here are some questions you need to seriously consider.
How Will the Divorce Affect My Family?
There is no question that a divorce affects everyone from grandparents and great grandparents to your children and grandchildren. Even siblings and friends suffer along with you as they define their new relationships with you as a single person. You may lose friends and family who are more loyal to your spouse than to you.
Can I Handle Being a Single Parent?
Sharing custody takes a bit of juggling, a lot of patience and some planning to make sure that the kids don’t feel overwhelmed. Of course, you can agree to share things like driving, attending sporting events and activities, but the day-to-day responsibilities will fall on you alone when your children are with you.
Can I Make Ends Meet on My Own?
Stay-at-home parents often struggle with this question. Many worry a judge will not treat them fairly or that their spouse will not be fair about support and maintenance. Even though you may have given up your career and stayed home to raise the children, you should always assume the worst-case scenario when answering this question. And ask yourself, what you will do to earn money if your spouse refuses to pay support for you or your children.
How Can I Protect My Assets Before I File?
If you do have any assets that you brought with you to the marriage or have inherited from relatives, try to gather as much documentation as possible to prove that these are rightly yours and not part of your marital estate. Any other assets that you own that you bought or received during your marriage, will be part of your marital estate. Don’t try to hide income or assets from the court.
Is it Really Over?
This is the million-dollar question. Most people have some lingering hope that the person they fell in love with so long ago is still there underneath all of the fighting and bickering. But, only you will know when you are ready to move on. There is certainly nothing wrong with trying more counseling or waiting until after the holidays.
At some point, you will know what is right for you—staying or leaving. But we recommend making this difficult decision with the help of your trusted therapist, close friend or clergy member. This person (or people) can offer you the empowerment and support you need.
Ready to Move Forward? Call to Learn About Your Options.
If you’d like to understand your options before making the final decision to divorce, please call an experienced divorce lawyer for an appointment. We can explain how a divorce will affect your assets, income and children.